Conflict & The Eye of The Storm
Dealing with Difficult PeopleAt the end of Summer 2005, the entire world was saddened and deeply distressed about the devastation wreaked by hurricane Katrina. Thousands of people were killed and millions on the U.S. Gulf Coast in Louisiana, Alabama and Mississippi were affected by flooding resulting from the hurricane. Power lines were down and 2.3 million people were without electricity. In some cities, 160 mph winds caused total destruction and desolation. Yet in others, a few minutes of calm winds and sunny skies prevailed. Why such discrepancy? Hurricane Katrina had a very unusually large eye.
A typical hurricane is 300 miles wide with an eye, or calm center, of 20 to 40 miles across. The eye is the calmest part of a hurricane. Surrounding the eye is a wall, which is the most violent part. The eye wall is almost a complete ring of thunderstorms and contains the strongest winds in the hurricane.
People in the midst of a hurricane find it hard to believe that turbulent winds and rain can suddenly stop and become clear skies with hardly a cloud as the eye passes over them for a few minutes to a half hour or more. Then, just as quickly, the violent winds and rain begin again, but this time from the opposite direction. This temporary lull by no means signals the end of the bad weather. In fact, once the eye of the storm has passed, its intensity is likely to be greater than before.
The Eye of a Conflict Storm
Figuratively, the eye of a hurricane can be likened to the quiet center of a disagreement or argument. There is a definite though fleeting pause in hostilities where antagonists take a “time-out” to soothe heated emotions and quiet racing blood pressure and heartbeats.
The quiet period and calm stillness that are characteristic of the eye of a conflict storm can prevail even when hostilities resume. It is possible to resolve any disagreements or conflict and avoid further drain of time and precious personal energy that results when disputes become difficult and vicious. Here are three reliable strategies you can use:
Stay in a safe place
At the other side of the eye, conflict can re-surface quickly packing hurricane force intensity. Maintain a cool, composed, serene, relaxed and unruffled demeanor-your safe place as you seek out points of agreement and resolution.
Think about the aftermath
Consider the consequences, repercussions and outcomes of the conflict. Promote open communication by dealing with conflict directly rather than concealing it.
Find creative solutions
Look for realistic and workable win-win solutions that build and enhance your relationships.
Hope In The Midst of The Storm
Relationships are hard work, so don’t quit prematurely. People are ALWAYS worth any extra effort!
